Parents Who Need Orientation

Folks, stand up and shake the hand of Reality!

Last night I attended a parent orientation meeting at the middle school, for those who have incoming sixth graders in September (elementary school is K through 5 in our district).  We were there for two hours.  While there were presentations from the principal, assistant principal, guidance counselors, and teachers, a good chunk of the session was spent addressing questions.  

I was amazed by some of the information I heard.  Because this is my second child to move up to the middle school, I wasn't paralyzed with fright as I'd been two years ago, and was able to listen in relaxed fashion (crochet hook in hand most of the time).  Top five amusing points made by the principal:

5.  If a child lives far enough away from the school to qualify for bus transportation, and the parent wishes the child to walk instead, the school is not going to hunt the child down and force him or her to ride the bus.  (This was in response to a question!)

4.  If a teacher notices that a child's attire may be inappropriate, the child is sent to the principal's office for the final judging (so consistency can be applied).  Some parents are incredulous that the child was not snagged at the beginning of the school day instead of, say, 5th period.  It never occurred to some of these people that the kids pull their pants halfway down or pull their skirts all the way up AFTER they arrive at school?  As if they would've been able to leave the house that way.

3.  Elementary school kids in our district are told categorically:  no backpacks with wheels.  There's technically no such restriction in middle school BUT parents don't consider that the wheeled backpacks are almost always too wide to fit into a school locker!

2.  Speaking of lockers, parents are told to buy the standard Master locks for our middle school kids.  No keys, no fancy Hannah Montana locks, no top of the line $40 works of art.  However, the principal said that, on any given day, he could walk through the hall and open many lockers with ease.  Why?  At least 40% of them have those fancy locks, which the kids have begged their parents to buy -- BUT the fancy ones are too large to fit on the locker.  So they just hang there without being able to close (and, therefore, lock).

1.  For seven years, since the principal has been at this school, he's been making the same speech about cell phones.  Buy them for your children if you must, but if the phone is seen during school hours, it then becomes his property and you, the parent, must go to his office personally to retrieve it.  What's the number one reason kids have cell phones taken away?   They are caught answering a call or text from a parent!   DUH!